Bereavement: a fancy name for grief.

Everyone at some point in their lives has had to deal with death, that makes it sound like everyone has met the grim reaper! But everyone has had different experiences with it, whether it is the natural way of life, or that death is just an envitiable part of life... Destruction.

All those movies making death seem like just another step, a step every living thing takes. But the way death is portrayed can vary so much between different films or even percieved by different people. For example if you watch some action film where there is implied or actual torture the value of all the characters lives go down because people are so willing to kill or cause pain to a character. If you compare that against a movie that purposefully gets you attached to a character to then find out they have died or have been injured, you feel so much more for that person (or even animal).

But no matter how you may feel about death and how you deal with it, every human has gone through some sort of experience with death. So you should never feel alone, but being alone in a world full of the same people: full of people who are similar to you, full of people who have gone through what you have gone through.

Everyone has their own way with dealing with situations, and everyone may have slightly different perceptions of death. But never feel alone. I know that is easier said than to be done (as most things are) but there is help out there; you don't have to be alone. Getting help, or even admitting to needing someone to help you isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of being strong enough to admit and begin to pick up he pieces. Be an inspiration for others out there who are dealing with the same pains as you.

You can be your own inspiration.

Ellie

Valentine's day...

Tomorrow is Valentine's day.
The time of the year everyone is meant to be celebrating with the ones they love, but to me this "holiday" is blown completely out of proportion. Don't get me wrong I am going to spend the day with my boyfriend, I just feel like this sign posted day of the year is meant to be showing that one in 7 billion how much they mean to you. You probably think this is being cute and caring, but to me you should be able to show that person everyday of every year as long as you are together, rather than that one time a year where you almost have to because of the pressure of the media and expectation.

I have no problem with the idea, it's a day to celebrate what you have and sometimes take for granted.
But something that should be celebrated and recognised everyday, not once a year.
This confusion for me over the day of false celebration is amplified when some companies or brands use all this to their advance to get money off people for a day that shouldn't really even be that much of a difference from regular days of the year. Simply putting a valentine's cliché such as a heart on something, and BOOM the price goes up more than it will ever be worth, just due to demand from the public and this exaggeration of a day.

SO basically to sum up: yes, I will be part of the false-y Valentine's day. But, no, not because of the media, not because of it is expected of me, but because I genuinely do want to show how much my loved ones mean to me. I will not be sucked into the false branding, but enjoy the fact I have the "greatest gift you will ever have: to love and be loved in return".

Ellie

P.S. Sorry for the assumptions and clichés today, but had to get that rant over! It's just one of those things I feel are so over exaggerated. This day may have a lot of meaning for a lot of people, and in ancient times, I have no doubt in that. Just today this day is used as an excuse to gain money from people who are sucked into the pressurised media.

More artwork... Finally!

I really should upload more artwork more often!

I was doing more or my art coursework on water, and for my final pieces I wanted to show the contrast between water being unpredictable, something strong and almost frightening- against the calm, natural beauty it can be.

So here is just some of the coursework I did, the piece with the face made from water (well what it was trying to be) needs more work. The shape of the actual face, and the colour and proportions of the lips doesn't seem to be quite right. But again being critical of my work before I show it probably doesn't fill everyone with confidence! So I hope you can see improvement in my work, or at least a more experimental, creative side!

The glass with water being poured in, I am actually quite proud of... Again being picky needs more work, and I had to draw from a photo... My imagination isn't that good!  But hopefully you can see how some of my work is tying together!

Try and keep everyone updated on the coursework, photography and artwork...

Ellie

My first review- saving money!

So I don't normally review, but there is a site that I was so proud of finding I thought I had to share it with you!

I was at first a bit sceptical of the site, the name itself "everything £5"... Every girl is up for a bargain but when prices go that low you have to wonder why! So I started looking through the site, clicking on so many things I wanted... The basket started mounted up...

In the end I ordered two pairs of shoes, a top and a jacket... All for £20. I seriously couldn't believe it, especially when the shoes I have wanted (and waited) to find for quite a while showed up on that site. Although the postage was £8, it came in a huge box with two shoe boxes inside, it felt like Christmas!

I bought a pair of wedged ankle boots with a fur cuff, they have been on my wish list for months! I wanted the Khaki colour on the website, but they were out of my size, so I went for the camel colour. Which I think will go quite well with jeans or leggings with any colour top really! I also got some "ugg" boots, they are a light beige colour and go up to mid calf. They have this fur lining that is so soft, I would of bought these boots at at least £30, although the sizing was a little off. But I read the reviews and they said to order the size up. (Reading reviews are always such a good representation of what the clothes are like). I got a coral coloured slouch top, which has a longer back, which I think will go perfectly with some leggings, it makes for a more casual look- and you can eat what ever and still look good! And the last item (finally!) was a cropped jacket that is grey and black, again, I would of paid easily over £15 for something like this. Because it's black and grey it nicely goes with everything I wear basically!

So I really really can't complain, all this stuff put a smile on my face after one of those days of being so utterly boring.

So please tell me what you think about this site, there is so much there for everyone!
My only complaints are that most of the sizes are for bigger girls- but I think that's more realistic sizing, so probably is a plus for most girls! Hope you have fun shopping-surfing!
Sorry I only posted pictures of the shoes, the other items don't look as good if they aren't worn, and I was just obsessed by the ankle boots!

Ellie

Being human.

Human instincts can make you challenge yourself, and how you really feel about something. Everyone shares the same fears and aspirations (in a generalised way). The fear of the unknown, the fear or rejection, the fear of betrayal.

But it doesn't just stop there, although everyone has experienced these fears their way of handling their fears can be compltely different. As could their way of showing love, hate (the awful clichés there!), grief and contentment. Sometimes these emotions are clouded by how they react to their feelings. You must think that this all seems so obvious but you do have those moments when you realise you would never react that way to what happens. But should you let them carry on hurting themselves or other people because of their reactions? Do you stop them from acting out how they truly feel?

Just writing this and thinking about how I would react to something horrifying or (the complete opposite) something so amazing you can't even believe it's true. I am listening to "Are we Human or are we Dancers" By the Killers. I know this song is old, and I would post this on my blog with a link but I don't know if we share the same music taste! But it just reminds me of how we expect to be living like glamorous dancers like we see in music videos, but in reality we have ups and downs, and with that we have our own way of dealing with these.

I mean for me I deal with stress in ways most people would think was mad, when I am stressed I work. A lot. I know most people would feel the stress from already working too much, or feeling the pressure from all their coursework/bills/work what ever it is. But for me tackling something head on and fighting for it makes it less scary, it already feels like you have taken away the pressure because you are closer to finishing. You are closer to what you have always aimed to do.

I question you... How would you handle something you really didn't want to know? How do you react to something upsetting? How do you comfort someone who is hurting someone else due to their own clouded feelings?

So just as a final point; if you ever feel like you are overflowing with emotions think about how your reactions make an impact on others. More then likely you didn't even know you had people ready to comfort you at any point, but you over looked them due to wearing "blinkers" and only thinking about the now. Think about things in perspective, everyone handles things differently, but you don't have to be the one who brings others down because of your own grief or problems.

Ellie.
(I apologise for the more hard hitting post today!)

Insecurities.

Every person has some part of themselves they would want to change, or try and hide from the rest of the world. It is only a minority of the population that are happy with being who they are, and those people have my admiration. I don't know if this is assuming too much; but these insecurities seem to be more evident in women, whether it is because they openly talk about this more or they themselves feel more pressurised to be like those models in Vogue or on the catwalk.

But my question is how far would you go to change the part of yourself you hate? How much pain would you put yourself through to loose a little bit of weight? How much would you give up to become the "perfect" person in your eyes?

Although I wanted this post to be more about emotional and physical things people want to change about themselves, I wanted to highlight the ever growing industry of cosmetic surgery. In my eyes it isn't worth all the money and pain, but again I have never felt like I have had to have any drastic changes in my appearance. I don't mean I wouldn't like to shed a few pounds here and there, I mean the completely drastic and risky operations that have more chance or killing you or deforming you in some way rather than having the effect you wanted.

Cosmetic surgery has been hyped up by so many celebrities, making it seem glamorous and something to aspire to be. Someone who can afford implants, someone you would see in magazines, someone every girl has ever dreamt of being.

But are the risks really worth it?
Is the pain really worth it?
Is it worth all the money?
When does it get to the point that nothing is left of you, as yourself, as a person?

My speech.

So I finally stopped having exams, and now I have the joys of "controlled assessments". Which basically is the same just in the classrooms. FUN.

The latest controlled assessment is in my English, and I have to create a speech on something that really inspires me, and I feel strongly on (enough to talk about it for 5 minutes making sustainable point).
We are allowed to talk about anyone, or anything.

There is so much that there is to talk about, but choosing one subject to create something powerful and interesting that everyone wants to listen to, while still making it strong by language techniques and fulfilling my criteria... Where to start!

I want to talk about assumptions and stereotypes. A topic that is very common on my blog. But I want to use snippets from my blog to help along with my english. I have spent so much time on this blog I think it is about time to share what I openly discuss on here!

But not only with the challenge of writing it all, we have to perform it, like a real speech would be said. I am fine with expressing myself quietly to people who actually want to take the time to hear me, my blog doesn't make anyone sit there and listen to me. It is for people who actually want to read about what I have to say. So HAVING to speak in front of people who couldn't care less how it goes to sit there and listen is daunting for me enough. Let alone the fact that I have huge stage fright.

I will hopefully post my speech on here once I have finished it, and tell you how it went!

Sorry for the boring update again, lots of coursework lately so the posts maybe less regular!

Ellie

Inspiration Becomes Aspiration.: I finally found it!

Inspiration Becomes Aspiration.: I finally found it! http://inspirationbecomesaspiration.blogspot.com/2011/11/inspirational-people.html

I finally found it!

This is a day of finding things! Talk about fate!... Although I'm not even sure if I believe in it myself.

But today I found the link for the photo I saw on facebook that went with one of my earliest posts on inspirational people. It was a woman fighting against cancer, and showing her strength. It is beautiful, and something I wish I could be more like.

Here is the picture I have been so hung up on for months!

It leaves me speechless even thinking about this photograph, my thoughts are with her.
The link:
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=242895642455307&set=a.124405720970967.25094.124215567656649&type=1&theater

I also received my prom dress in the post! At first I was sceptical of the whole idea of getting dressed up for a evening of teenagers trying to act formal. So I didn't spend much on it, but it is simple and elegant. So Hopefully Prom will live up to everyone else's expectations more than mine!

Sorry for the boring post, it was more of an update. :)

Ellie

Do teachers set us up for an F?

I know quite a lot of you out there will be like yes, no question it is the teachers fault their students don't pass. But do teachers really set up their pupils for a FAIL?

As personal experience I have been okay listening to teachers that ramble, the teachers that do absolutely nothing in the class all they do is make tea, I have had teachers that send you out for coughing. But does all this really mean that you are set to fail? Are teachers the ones fully to blame for an F? Or would you take some of that responsibility?

So I can understand that different teachers have different ways of teaching, but do they really need to push you into exams? Make you feel like you are going to explode with the pressure of exams? ...
Everyone has at some point felt like exams are like hell on Earth. The word exams (for me) just makes me want to scream. I don't know if it is the teachers mind washing you into this sense of stupidity a month or so before so you feel you must revise, spend all your time at your desk reading through all the many sheets and notes you have made through the module/course in order to even scrape through, let alone get the grades you want! But what's more is that for me once you go back and look at your notes you can remember them being legible in some way... Well that didn't work too well. My handwriting seems to have been taken over by a four year old child. And, again, I want to blame this on the teachers (stick with me here!) because they ask you to write down notes as they talk, and some teachers have the power of not needing to take a breath or any sort of pause. So therefore leads to the handwriting of a four year old.

Maybe you just have teachers that you can barely listen to or watch for more than thirty seconds at a time because they are so utterly dull, or really have no enthusiasm for their subject. This is something that really frustrates me, people who are meant to be encouraging, inspiring others; but instead create boredom and a sense of hatred towards that subject. I mean they might have just wrecked that person's chance at doing well in that subject or even school because they feel that if they aren't good at something why bother?

And I know there are millions of teachers out there cringing at one students outlook on how teachers CAN wreck school for SOME students. But there are so many teachers that ARE inspiring, that give up so much time and effort to get that pupil to where they need to be.

So what do you think? Are teachers solely to blame for bad grades?

Ellie